


iAm Desperately in Love

by AlwaysDreamingAway



Category: iCarly
Genre: Friendship, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-17
Updated: 2010-05-07
Packaged: 2013-12-19 14:00:40
Rating: T
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,189
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5903702/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2171183/AlwaysDreamingAway
Summary: Sam has finally realized her feelings for Freddie. But there are some unexpected obstacles... Will she finally be able to confess? And what will Freddie's answer be?





	1. Chapter 1

**iAm Desperately in Love**

In this story there will be used one song for each chapter. The particular thing about this story is that all the artists' names begin with an A.

**Chapter 1: I think I'm jealous of your girlfriend**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.  
**

Song: Alicia Keys - Girlfriend

"Here Freddie, I made you some juice." Carly said with her usual bright smile when she handed him over his glass.

"Thanks, Carly." Freddie smiled, too.

Sam was annoyed. There was no obvious reason for it, because everything was like usual, just NORMAL. Nevertheless, Sam wished Freddie was smiling at her like he always smiled at Carly instead of running away or looking frightened.

OK, she admitted to herself it was her fault he was somehow feared of her, but now, she couldn't make it undone. Plus, she really loved that little fights… Teasing Freddork was both easy and fun!

Sam wished she could act normal like Carly. But it had been like that from the beginning.

No one had noticed, but Sam realized Freddie was special to her.

She noticed herself eagerly waiting to spend time with Freddie. Moreover, she punched him a lot more than before so could get in physical contact with him.

Sam glanced over to her best friends. They were both sitting on the couch watching TV.

It was 'Seattle Beach'. She sighed in relief because they weren't 'flirting' with each other.

In fact, Sam knew she was thinking rubbish. Like Carly always said, Carly and Freddie were just friends. There was absolutely no need to be jealous.

Though her realization, Sam didn't plan to ever tell him about her feelings.

There was no chance that would work out because in her eyes there was no way Freddie was going to love her ever.

I hope you liked it! Please rate an review!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Isn't it ironic, don't you think?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.**

Song: Alanis Morissette - Ironic

Sam jammed her science books in her locker.

What was up next? She couldn't remember? Who cares? She hated school so there was no need for her to memorize that stupid time table.

She took a look at the time table that was pinned on the inside of her locker door next to some really nice pictures of Drake Bell. In fact, that was the only sign of tidiness in Sam's locker.

Oh no! Next lesson was math! Yuck…

She decided to beat up that idiot who had invited such boring crap.

When she grabbed her math book she heard someone was approaching her. She turned around.

"Hi, Carls. What's up?" It was a surprise, because the brunette was supposed to have gym class at the other end of the school building. Her best friend was out of breath.

"Where you running? Is the school building on fire?" The blonde sent a hopeful glance at Carly.

"Yes, I've been running. And no, the school is not burning. Listen, Sam. I got big news to tell you!"

There was the aura of something bad coming up but she couldn't figure out why.

"Can't you tell me later? I'm already late for my math class." Sam knew Carly wouldn't believe her. If Sam would finally care about being late the world must have made a turn of 360 degrees.

"NO. I ran to you ONLY TO TELL YOU THIS!"

"Really? OK, tell me." Sam gave in because there seemed to be no possibility of avoiding.

Carly giggled.

"You know… Oh no, I don't know if I should say that out loud…" She hesitated.

"OK. I think I just say it now: I'm together with Freddie!"

"WHAT???" It really seemed like the world had done a 360 degree turn a few seconds ago…

"That's unbelievable! How? When?"

Sam was surprise of herself that she was able to utter even a single word.

"You remember yesterday? You went home and Freddie stayed at my place. Then he made a remark that he loves me an such like always and I thought: Why not? Maybe I should give him a chance? So I said we could be girlfriend and boyfriend if he wanted to and he agreed."

"I want the deeds! Did you two kiss already?" It was a bad idea to ask that but she was to curious. She couldn't bear not to know what was going on behind her back.

"No, not yet. Oh, I have to run to gym class bow. We can discuss that later. Bye, Sam."

Wasn't that ironic? During the time Sam had seen as a friend she wouldn't have been jealous if Carly and he had dated… And now that she finally had realized her feelings, Carly and Freddie were dating! Though she didn't really had intended to confess to him she didn't really foreclose this possibly in the future. But now everything was going down the drains…

Please rate and review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: It's not OK**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.  
**

Song: Anastacia - Left outside alone

Sam sneezed in her checkered handkerchief. She had gotten a cold since a few days and that hadn't happened by accident.

Two days after Carly had told her the shocking news, she was all coughy and sneezy had to stay in bed for three days. In all objectivity she was lucky because she didn't have to school for three whole days but even that couldn't make up for the fact that everything seemed so damn hopeless…

That day was the first day she was allowed to go to school again. She had preferred to rather not go. The first thing she saw when she entered the school building were Carly and Freddie, hugging and acting all lovey-dovey at the school hallway.

Sam had the urge to vomit right on the floor.

Carly and Freddie were like that all day. It was the worst.

Now Sam was standing at the bus stop. It was raining and she was freezing because she only wore light clothing. It was really cold out there.

Sam had tried to act normal but she didn't get through.

They only said a short hi, then they were facing each other again, flirting.

She went away. It was the first time she felt like the third wheel.

Somehow the two had left her out. She was working hard controlling her tears.

The blonde-headed demon couldn't risk to lose her reputation.

Carly and Freddie were a disappointment to her those days.

The two persons she respected and trusted the most… Whom should she confide in now? There was nobody she could think of.

This was a really short chapter but there will be more chapters ahead. Please rate an review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements even if it leads nowhere?**

Song: Adele - Chasing Pavements

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.**

She didn't know where to go so she decided to stay at the bus stop for now. It didn't matter to her if her cold got worse…

She looked down at the pavement when she realized a pair of feet standing in fron tof her. It looked like a male shoe size 8 or bigger.

Sam lifted her head.

"Hey Kiddo, what are you doing here? You're drenched all over! Don't you have an umbrella?"

Spencer looked very concerned. He had a grocery bag in his left hand and a green umbrella in the other.

Sam didn't answer.

"Let's go to our apartment. You can change in to some of Carly's clothes."

"No. I'm fine. Please leave me alone." That was the last she wanted to do. Go to the Shay's apartment and watch the catastrophe happening right in front of her eyes.

"What the hell is wrong with you? I won't let you risk your health!"

There seemed to be no way out.

"Listen. I don't want to see Carly now." Sam was unable to suppress a sigh much to her dismay.

"Did you two have a fight? That's odd. Carly didn't seemed to be depressed. Quite the opposite, she is in high spirits since a few days…" Spencer stared absentmindedly into space while trying to recall Carly's mood during the last week. When he looked at the place where Sam was supposed to be she was gone. He looked around and saw her running away. He decided to run after her. It was hard for him because he wasn't quite well-toned but he had luck on his side because Sam was weakened due to her cold.

Finally, Spencer had caught her up.

"Wait, Sam. Carly isn't in the apartment now. She won't be there tonight. She will sleep at Freddie's place."

The blond-headed demon felt her heart turn to stone. She now was more like a broken-hearted girl.

"OK. I'll come with you." At least Spencer seemed to care about her. And going to the apartment meant food and dry clothes. At least something good this day.

Thank you for the review (Sorry, but I forgot your name)! At least someone likes this story... If aren't content with this story please tell me what you didn't like so I can make it better in the next chapter!So please rate and review!

This chapter is a bit short but I decided it would be better to use a new song for the next part.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: I'm invisible**

Song: Ashlee Simspon - Invisible

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.**

"Here, put that on." Spencer advised giving Sam a blue shirt and jeans from Carly and pointing to the bathroom with the other hand.

5 minutes later Sam felt a bit better. At least she wasn't risking to have a cold anymore now that she wore dry clothes. She had grabbed a towel from the bathroom shelf and rubbed her hair which was still soakin'wet. Spencer looked at the puddles forming on the floor. He decided not to say anything after he had seen Sam's face.

"Wanna eat ham?" Spencer was glad someone was at the apartment. Since Carly and Freddie were together, he felt a bit lonely and the apartment was very quiet sometimes…

Spencer made his way to the fridge. All the time he was aware of the fact that Sam could do that by herself but he recognized there was something wrong with Carly's best friend. He didn't want to bug her in this mood.

Spencer gave her a package of ham.

"Are you gonna tell me what's wrong?" Spencer sat down next to Sam on the sofa.

"Nothing." Sam tried to avoid Spencer's gaze and looked in the opposite the direction which was the kitchen. She occupied herself with counting the refrigerator magnets.

"Sam! I already know there is something bugging you. Remember, you gave me a little hint at the bus stop." Sam felt Spencer's hand on her shoulder. She turned around. Spencer's eyebrows were lifted and he was looking curious.

Sam took a deep breath.

"Do I really have to say this?"

"Yes."

"OK.

"It was this Monday… I was standing at my locker, ready to go to stupid math class. The Carly came to me, running. And then she said…"

Sam bit her lip. This was hell! She didn't want to speak of it. It was already the worst to even think about it.

Spencer had watched her the whole time.

"Is it because Carly is Freddie's girlfriend now?" he questioned.

Sam was startled.

That couldn't be possible! What the hell was wrong with the world since this week?! Spencer usually didn't seem to notice ANYTHING so why did he notice her feelings???

Spencer didn't wait for her to answer.

"I understand. It's hard if your best friend has less time for you. I remember when Socko had this girlfriend named Emily. There were together all the time and when I spent time with him he was always talking about her…"

That was enough!

"THAT'S NOT IT!!!" she bursted out. She couldn't stand how Spencer got it all wrong like always and that she even had to talk about the whole thing… It was totally getting on her nerves…

Spencer abruptly stopped talking. He looked at the blondheaded demon in awe.

"I don't want HIM to be with HER!"

"Well, then why didn't you confess to Freddie?"

"WHY? Because there isn't even the tiniest chance he feels the same. I punched him as often the only thing he feels for me fear."

"Are you sure? I mean you two are also best friends."

"What does it matter? Being friends doesn't mean loving somebody. Anyways, he is with Carly now. That is all he ever wanted so there is no chance for me anymore. He didn't even look at me since Monday. So did Carly. I'm starting to feel like I'm invisible, at least to them."

"That's hard. But I'm sure, if the first rush of love is over, the two will be back to normal."

Spencer looked at the clock.

"It's already 11 o'clock. You should go to bed now."

I know that this chapter isn't that interesting but the next one will be better, I promise! Please rate and review. And if you didn't like something you could at least tell me what I can make better! Thanks to reviewers SeddieCreddie12, IzzyRoxYourSox13 and loves2smile! I really appreciated your nice reviews. :) If no one had said something good about this story, I may have cancelled it.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: So why am I with you now?**

Song: Agnes - Release Me

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.**

Freddie slowly opened his eyes. It took him a minute to perceive his surrounding. He recognized he was in the living room of the apartment he lived with his mother. He looked around. Carly was lying next to him on the sofa. The brunette was sleeping and had put ther arm around his neck.

SHOOT! He had to get out of this position. If his mother found them in this position they would be both screwed! He tried to raise his upper body but that was impossible because Carly was literally clinging to him. She was very heavy due to her sleeping state.

Freddie sighed. The past few days he didn't have any time alone. Carly was permanently around dragging him to places, flirting…

He was wondering if he should be happy about the fact he was finally together with the girl he had always been dreaming of. Carly was a very nice girl. She was always kind and polite and never to loud. Besides that she was pretty and clever.

But somehow… he was kind of disappointed… He had expected to have an exciting time but it was all very boring. There were no surprises. He could always predict what would be happening.

Also, he missed Sam. He only saw her when they were doing iCarly, but he didn't quite have the chance to talk to her, because Carly always kind of occupied him. When he tried to start a talk with Sam she immediately interfered! He wasn't quite sure, but it seemed like she was even jealous of Sam!

Freddie couldn't bear it anymore. He catched a glimpse of his watch. It was 3:00 AM. He didn't think he would be able to sleep anymore.

He tried to wriggle around to losen Carly's grip on him. Surprisingly, he was successful.

He turned around one last time to check if his girlfriend was still sleeping. Then he headed quietly to his room to put on some clothes. Next, he sneaked to the fire escape. He needed to think about his relationship with Carly.

I'm sorry because I needed a few days to update. The end of this story is near. There will only be one or two more chapters.

I want to thank all the people who favorited or alerted this story and also the reviewers, this time especially SeddieCreddie12, IzzyRoxYourSox13, loves2smile and PartyPooper845. Thank you guys, that was very nice of you! :) Please rate and review!


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: We just have to face it**

Song: ABBA - Knowing Me; Knowing You

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.**

Freddie opened his eyes because he felt very cold. He realized he must have fallen asleep on the fire escape. Unfortunately, he didn't bring a blanket. In addition, it was windy, too. He tried to figure out what he was doing here the day before. Slowly, his memory came back. He had made a decision.

He raised from the lawn chair and went through the door to his room. In his drawers there were some warm clothes. He picked a blue hoodie and blue jeans.

Freddie made an effort to figure out if his mother was home. There weren't any noises. Then he remembered his mother wouldn't be home the next days. She had to go to a nurse workshop because of work-related advancement.

On one handside, he was happy he had some time for himself, but on the other handside he couldn't enjoy this. There were more important things to do now.

* * *

Freddie rang the door bell of the Shay's apartment. Carly opened the door.

"Hey, darling! That's so nice of you to visit me first thing in the morning. I just had the same thought a moment ago!"

She hugged Freddie enthusiastically and gave him a peck on the cheek.

Honestly, he hated being called 'darling'. It was somehow like in a very cheesy soap opera…

Freddie and Carly sat down on the sofa (like always…)

Carly had that expectant look in her eyes. That would be hard. Knowing her, she would hit rock bottom. But he simply HAD to do this.

"Carly?"

"Yeah?" Carly smiled.

"Listen, I have something to say to you."

"Oh, that sounds interesting. Tell me." Carly wasn't aware of what was going on.

"Our relationship… It's quite different from what I imagined it…"

"Oh… What does that mean?" Really, Carly was completely clueless.

"I thought we would have so much fun."

"Didn't we have a lot of fun together?"

"Well… actually no." Freddie looked guilty.

"OK!?" It dawned on Carly.

"I'm not content with what we have now."

"We can work on it." This perspective cheered her up.

"Listen, Carly. I'm very, very sorry but I see no way for improvement. I don't think we match each other as lovers. It's best if we are just friends."

"YOU WANNA BREAK UP WITH ME??? What the… Seriously, I can't believe it!"

Freddie had never seen the brunette girl so angry and agitated. She was running from one corner of the room to the other again and again.

"Just get out of my apartment now or else…!!!" Carly slammed the door behind him.

Freddie turned around to face the door in order to say something but then he gave up.

There was nothing left to say at the moment.

Freddie realized he was starting to cry. There were also good times with Carly even though their relationship had been short.

Was it the right decision to break up? Now he wasn't so sure anymore. And how should he face Carly? Was that the end of their webshow? And what about Sam? Would she take sides or not?

* * *

**I know I didn't update for a longer time. I'm very sorry for that but I was busy! I hope you keep read this story though.**

**I hope you liked it! Please rate and review! Thanks to all reviewers, alerters and favers! ;)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: And if you come to me you know I'll make it right**

Song: Atomic Kitten - If you come to me

**Disclaimer: I Don't own iCarly.**

There was no way he could make a stand against his mother.

"Fredward Benson, I said you should go to the grocery store so you WILL go to the grocery store RIGHT NOW! Is that clear?" His mother stood right in front of him with her arms akimbo. It was one of her usual curtain-lectures.

Freddie slowly moved out of the apartment. Unbeknowenst to him, his mother didn't charge him with that because it was necessary. It was more that she was well aware of the fact that her little Freddie wasn't so well these days. But she couldn't ask him about it. She was sure he wouldn't tell her. So she had decided it would be good for him to go out. He had been in the apartment for three whole days now only leaving it for school.

* * *

Freddie looked across the street. It was only 100 meters till he would have reached the grocery store. He turned to the right and looked at Bushwell Park. It was the place were he, Carly and Sam had been playing when they were kids. Suddenly, he forgot about going to the grocery store. It was a bit melodramatic, but he had the urge to visit the places that he used to go when they were all happy together. The swing set being his goal, he entered the park at the west gate.

There was no time to realize anything. It literally hit him unprepared: A fist was rammed into his stomach.

Freddie crooked in pain on the hard ground. When he looked up again Sam held out her hand to help him up.

"Sam, what the hell was that for? And what are you doing here anyway?"

Shoot, he had just broken his promise. He had sworn to himself not to talk to Carly or Sam anymore because he didn't want to force anyone to take sides. As expected, he had felt lonely the last three days since his breakup with Carly, but there was no other way for him.

"That was your punishment for not talking with me anymore. You don't have any respect for me, do you?"

Sam was both furious and hurt.

"I don't understand you. I thought you don't like me and I'm annoying to you and so on. That means the last three days must have been the best days of your lives." Freddie tried to be funny. It wasn't his purpose to tell her his real intentions. He wasn't even sure if she knew about the situation.

"Benson, you're such a dork. I should punch for your respectlessness but in your current situation it would be less fun than usual because you wouldn't be an equal partner."

Sam was really talking rubbish these times. He didn't understand at all.

"What do you mean with that?"

"Quit that dumb asking thing! It's as simple as this: I know that you and Carly broke up three days ago. Spencer told me. I suppose you're pretty down now because she was your beloved Carly…"

Freddie felt the situation was getting more and more akward. This put him totally off his stride. He hadn't factored Sam probably knew everything. Without thinking he told Sam everything.

"Really? Mama is surprised. That explains why Carly didn't talk to me, too."

Sam reached in her pocket and got a fatcake out. News – were they bad or good – always made her hungry.

Freddie watched her eating. His eyes followed the fatcake. It made it's way to her mouth. Now it was touching her lips. Her red, full, soft lips… His face came closer to hers.

Sam had finished eating. She looked up and realized her face was about ten centimetres away from Freddie's. Her mesmerinzing blue eyes were staring into his warm brown eyes.

Freddie fully recognized Sam's beauty for the first time in his life. He was wondering why he had never seen her that way before. How could have someone ordninary and boring like Carly distracted him for years from a gorgeous woman like her? What a waste of time.

Sam smiled. Brightly. It was time to take the matter in her own hands.

She grabbed Freddie by his collar and kissed him demandingly. It was even better than they're first kiss. And they wouldn't keep it a secret!

This is really the end of this story. Thanks to all 'faithful' readers who liked the story and read till the end! Also thanks to all the people who favorited or alerted this story.

Nevertheless, if you liked it, please rate and review.

And don't be too sad. I'm planning to write new stories and I also want to continue iGeisha. ;)

See you next time!


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